when you were seventeen

when you were seventeen and your spine hard as steel, you were immortal because the night never dies and there is light in your eyes liquid courage burns down your throat and you rise up from the ashes of vertigo with the same damn rhythm loop replaying in your mind in the intoxication of the night. they've been doing it for years and they do nothing but ache but you, you're brand new tonight, tonight I am new everything screams and there is nothing so amazing like your friends beside you and lovers with sex on their minds and the last breath of moment into perfection that you realize you could just. die.

and sometimes i'm sorry i wasn't there for any of it

death comes slowly but surely but happiness is a choice